SKELETONS IN THE CLOSET

Today i really looked stupid,my boss asked me what tribe i am from and i proudly said I'm Kenyan while wearing that banana smile us folks used to write about in compositions.Everyone suddenly bursts out laughing and since i didn't get the joke, i stare blankly at them and flash a shy smile at random faces hoping to get an explanation from a sympathetic non concerned audience.


In Luhya dialect,  my boss said " hawa ni wale wajinga wa Nairobi wanajiita dotcom". After the thunderous laughter had abated, he mockingly asked in swahili, "sijakuuliza unatoka nchi gani, nimekuuliza wewe ni wa kabila gani?" A few years ago Ekko Dydda came to our church to perform and  afterwards he participated in an interview in which he was asked what his surname was. He simply said his name is Sam Ekodyda and he is a Kenyan, refusing to say his other name which would have given his tribe away.

Since that day, i vowed to say I'm a Kenyan, except of course, when a handsome man asks me, I will proudly say I am from Werugha (good thing is most of you don't know where that is- hehe, just kidding).

It is such a shame that at this time and age, even after all that bloodshed in 2006\2007 we can dare be tribal. " sisi waluhya lazima tusaidiane" said my boss in his vernacular. "unajua vile hawa wakikuyu husaidiana sana so we must follow suit". I am disappointed, truly I am, because all those peace campaigns and 'Let's unite' talks were all in vain. 

So I try to convince my colleagues that Kenya is bigger than their tribe but little did i know that goats would have made a better audience! know what, i  really don't care what you think or what you believe in, but i care that you do not introduce your children ( of which some, BTW  are from my generation); to the skeletons of tribalism in your closets. Spare the innocent children tafadhali who don't know the difference of a donkey from you. Iin fact, i am proud of being a dot-com because my life and that of your children revolves around cities and we don't really give a crap which tribe we come from so long as we got our groove right! Now how's that for a laugh, BOSS?"